While Moms Are Busy Caring For Babies, Who Is Caring For Moms?
As moms, and women in general, we tend to gravitate towards caregiving roles and putting everyone besides our self, first. It can be hard to ask for help, or ask for what we want. To be honest, it is even hard to recognize what we want in the first place to even ask! Have you ever felt that way?!
Self-care is SO important, especially as a mom. Maybe you’ve heard the saying, you can’t pour from an empty cup. Meaning, you’ve got to do something to fill up your cup in order to have anything left to pour out to others. You may be thinking, great, yes, I get that, but… What do I do?! How do I fill it up?! How do I even find the energy, let alone the time?!
"Do what works for YOU. Don't compare yourself to other moms because no journey is exactly the same. Some have support from loved ones and some don't. You're constantly pouring into a helpless little baby and it's vital to replenish yourself with grace, love, care, and compassion. Remind yourself daily that you're doing the best you can with what you have." - new first time mom
Let's face it. Moms are busy. Here are 3 things you can still do to care for yourself:
Identify your priorities and values. Maybe even make a list if that is your jam! (it totally is mine…)
Then, answer this question, “What is your WHY being each decision.” Are you doing things purposefully, or meaninglessly. Be intentional.
Reframe those unrealistic negative thoughts to slowly begin shifting your mindset. If you’re stuck, can you add in some gratitude journaling, or talk more kindly to yourself; give yourself credit for the things you’re doing well, or maybe call a friend/family member to lean on for support?
Identify your priorities and values
It all starts with priorities, intention, and mindset. Priorities can be identified through personal reflection and answering a few questions, starting with clarifying your values. Each decision you make can either bring you closer or farther away from your values. So...what are your values? What is important to you? What do you want your life (IN.THIS.STAGE.) to look like? How can you make sure YOU are a priority too?
Next, your intentions. How can you be intentional each day to do even just one thing that brings you closer to your values? Remember those priorities and what is important to you? Begin putting into motion that image of motherhood (IN.THIS.STAGE.) with small intentional steps. You have to WANT it. And you have to remind yourself some days WHY you want it. Trust me, it won’t always be easy. You have to work hard for what you want.
Now, we hear that word "intentional" a lot, but what does it really mean? Being intentional is doing something on purpose, for a specific purpose, in line with YOUR purpose. Get the idea? It's purposeful! And everyone has a different purpose and reason for doing things, which all leads back that specific person’s values. Making decisions that lead you closer to your values, ON PURPOSE.
Slowly begin shifting your mindset
Lastly, let’s talk about mindset. So often we can get stuck in a negativity mindset, discouraged mindset, or even loneliness and lack of motivation mindset. What does your mindset look like, or feel like, right now? Mindset shapes how we think about things, the world, and ourselves based on our current belief system. Sometimes all it takes is a small shift in our thoughts to drastically impact our mindset. Caring for yourself looks different for everyone. Oftentimes though, it takes INTENTIONAL choices towards your PRIORITIES slowly day by day, to shift your MINDSET to a more peaceful place. It's true, moms ARE busy, but it's also true, prioritizing self-care now, will save you from burnout later.
"Self-care is so important, it's not selfish! It's the springboard to caring for your family. We can't fully love our children if we aren't loving ourselves first."; "Have your own interests and friends away from home. Be present." - experienced moms of adult children